The defining decade
Our "thirty-is-the-new-twenty" culture tells us the twentysomething years don't matter. Some say they are a second adolescence. Others call them an emerging adulthood. Dr. Meg Jay, a clinical psychologist, argues that twentysomethings have been caught in a swirl of hype and misinformation, much of which has trivialized what is actually the most defining decade of adulthood. Drawing from a decade of work with hundreds of twentysomething clients and students, THE DEFINING DECADE weaves the latest science of the twentysomething years with behind-closed-doors stories from twentysomethings themselves. The result is a provocative read that provides the tools necessary to make the most of your twenties, and shows us how work, relationships, personality, social networks, identity, and even the brain can change more during this decade than at any other time in adulthood-if we use the time wisely. THE DEFINING DECADE is a smart, compassionate and constructive book about the years we cannot afford to miss.
Stats for nerds
14recommend
24mentions
21people
2012–2023years
67% recommend33% neutral
Mentions per year
What Hacker News says
- This is a good book. Another one I would recommend from this genre is "The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter--And How to Make the Most of Them Now".
- Read The Defining Decade
- This is great advice, recommended by a clinical psychologist in the book "The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter." From the book:
"One thing this has taught me is that a good story goes further in the twentysomething years than perhaps at any other time in life. College is done and résumés are fledgling, so the personal narrative is one of the few things currently under our control. As a twentysomething, life is still more about potential than proof. Those who can tell a good story about who they are and what they want leap over those who can’t.
"[...] But what is a good story? If the first step in establishing a professional identity is claiming our interests and talents, then the next step is claiming a story about our interests and talents, a narrative we can take with us to interviews and coffee dates. Whether you are a therapist or an interviewer, a story that balances complexity and cohesion is, frankly, diagnostic. Stories that sound too simple seem inexperienced and lacking. But stories that sound too complicated imply a sort of internal disorganization that employers simply don’t want."
The author includes other good advice, such as practical advice on why you shouldn't be afraid to lean on your network if you have the opportunity. In essence, the original poster can frame past experience with the startup as evidence as evidence that they would be a great fit for a position at another company.
- Omg, please do me a favour and read this book:
Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter And How To Make The Most Of Them Now
I only read it when I was 30. It has a a typical self-help title but honestly it has all you need to succeed in the next decade. I wish I could have read it at your age.
- A few have stood out:
- "The Defining Decade: Why Your 20's Matter and How to Make The Most of Them Now": it motivated me to find a fulfilling a career in tech (among other things).
- "On the Shortness of Life" (Seneca) - Really made me take a hard look at my life, for the better.
- "Eat and Run" - Interesting read about an Ultramarathoner. Inspired me to find the motivation for doing "tough things" in general.
- That's the most fundamental question: why life matters, and how do you use the infinitesimal small amount of time you have in this universe.
Of course only you can answer the question, but something that helped me in my own introspection was Clayton Christensen's book "How to measure your life" [1].
Also, for those in the mid-twenties and unsure about career, family, relationships and body/mind, I highly recommend "The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter" [2]. It may not be relevant for you anymore (I read in my almost forties), but I wish I had read two decades earlier. Here's a short summary I wrote on Quora [3].
Good luck on your journey!
[1] https://www.amazon.com/How-Will-Measure-Your-Life/dp/0062102...
[2] https://www.amazon.com/Defining-Decade-Your-Twenties-Matter/...
