The Power of Now
Eckhart Tolle has emerged as one of today's most inspiring teachers. In The Power of Now, already a worldwide bestseller, the author describes his transition from despair to self-realization soon after his 29th birthday. Tolle took another ten years to understand this transformation, during which time he evolved a philosophy that has parallels in Buddhism, relaxation techniques, and meditation theory but is also eminently practical. In The Power of Now he shows readers how to recognize themselves as the creators of their own pain, and how to have a pain-free existence by living fully in the present. Accessing the deepest self, the true self, can be learned, he says, by freeing ourselves from the conflicting, unreasonable demands of the mind and living "present, fully, and intensely, in the Now."
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- Hey friend, I am also 38, and I am also recently "aloned". I had a break up in August and lived with my parents until February.
At first it was strange, I was acutely feeling the loneliness. But gradually I started seeing its upsides, and I am beginning to dangerously enjoy it haha.
I am using the time and space to take care of and express myself. Live slowly, cook myself warm dinners, nice coffees; I made a cozy nook for reading, I am planning on adding fragrant flowers to my terrace.
I am planning on a routine, which includes going to the gym and actually trying and enjoy moving my body. Sometimes I have the luxury of just sitting in the park next to the gym and soak up some sun, enjoy the sounds if birds and the water fountain.
I am hybrid so I get to go to the office and see my colleagues. Somehow, luckily, every weekend some social event happened, a dear friend came to visit. It was my aunts birthday. I also have a housewarming planned in two weeks which motivates me to make the place beautiful to show off.
My advice would be, simply, to focus on the current moment. Thoughts take you awry, try not to ruminate. Have a plan, and trust the process. There are five things absolutely needed for health and happiness(not in a particular order):
1. Good food 2. Exercising 3. Sunlight 4. Sleep 5. Friends
So while you are alone, I would question the rest too, do you eat well? Do you exercise? Do you go out? Do you sleep well?
The way our mind works is whenever a state comes up, it ups the likelihood of that state to come up again. So try to summon happy states, would be difficult and feel fake at first but it really works. Gratitude is a good one. Writing or expressing it doesn't work well for me, so I like to do it when I clean, I feel grateful as I am gently scrubbing the mirror for instance for helping me fix up my appearance. Find yours.
From what you wrote it sounds like you already know what to do, but you are reluctant. Why is that? One could identify with one's depression by ruminating over it.
In closing I highly recommend the book, the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, it has a free audiobook on YouTube too.
I wish you the best of luck. Life could be whatever you want it to be and there is no true self, all is constructed and you can engineer your psyche anew.
Cheers
- I can second that the Book or even better Audiobook (read by Tolle himself) The Power of Now can have profound impact on ones life. I would recommend to give it a shot.
- The Power of Now - Eckhart Tolle
- - Neuromancer, William Gibson
- Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson
- The Diamond Age, Neal Stephenson
- Anathem, Neal Stephenson
- Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell
- Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
- Hacking: The Art of Exploitation, Jon Erickson
- The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle
- Prometheus Rising, Robert Anton Wilson
- Mystical Qabalah, Dion Fortune
- Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling
- The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle is a life changer. It’s more spiritual than scientific but I highly recommend it.
