1-2-3 magic

What Hacker News says

1. shearskillJun 2019
   The book 1-2-3 Magic tames even the wildest kids if you are consistent. It feels humane to give kids a few chances to change their trajectory. Highly recommend.
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2. gwbas1cApr 2019
   As a parent who added a second child when my first was 2 and a half, I think you're doing it wrong.

   A year later, both children are still extremely demanding. It's all about setting limits and knowing when to bend them, like last night when my daughter finally figured out how to wake herself up in the middle of the night to go poop. That's one of the rare sleepless nights that's worth it.

   Otherwise, knowing how you sleep is also important. I fumble around in the dark, use extremely dim lights, and have no problem letting my kids sleep with me for an hour or two. A full night's sleep is vital. I'm really good at falling asleep after giving a bottle because I make them before going to bed, turn on no lights, and keep my eyes closed once I'm in the rocking chair.

   > You have to add in a boss who spends 2/3rd of the time you're home screaming at you to the mix.

   You really need to learn modern discipline techniques. We use 1-2-3 magic. When our toddler screams at us, it's usually an immediate "ONE!" If it's really bad, there's a time out with no counting. It really works.

   I even help my wife learn by shouting "ONE!" "TWO!" ... when I'm out of the room and hear my toddler get tough. The 1-2-3 magic technique requires a lot of disciple to not get sucked into a toddler argument.

   See https://www.amazon.com/1-2-3-Magic-Effective-Discipline-Chil...

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3. thorinAug 2016
   Agree with the above. My daughter is nearly 3 and very confident and energetic. My wife picked up this book https://www.amazon.co.uk/1-2-3-Magic-Effective-Discipline-Pa... and is using the techniques. It seems to be working. It's more a means of training the adult not the child. Try not to freak out when they do the wrong thing but make them know it's not acceptable. Reward and give attention for good behavior and don't hold a grudge.

   Good luck!

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4. rymohrAug 2016
   Thank you everyone that offered advice and encouragement on this. Here's a few of the top resources that were shared for anyone else in a similar situation:

   http://parenting.stackexchange.com/

   https://www.amazon.com/Unconditional-Parenting-Moving-Reward...

   https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Kids-Will-Listen/dp/14516638...

   https://www.amazon.com/Highly-Sensitive-Child-Children-Overw...

   https://www.amazon.com/No-Drama-Discipline-Whole-Brain-Nurtu...

   https://www.amazon.com/Whole-Brain-Child-Revolutionary-Strat...

   https://www.amazon.com/Explosive-Child-Understanding-Frustra...

   https://www.amazon.com/Simplicity-Parenting-Extraordinary-Ca...

   https://www.amazon.com/1-2-3-Magic-Effective-Discipline-Chil...

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5. sterlinmMar 2021
   Some of the advice about controlling your reactions to avoid reinforcing tantrums etc. sounds straight out of 1-2-3 Magic, an old and popular parenting book. https://smile.amazon.com/1-2-3-Magic-Discipline-Effective-Pa...
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6. bubblewrapJun 2019
   "Oster now finds herself brainstorming punishments that a four-year-old will find “devastating.”" (on 1-2-3 Magic)

   So she found it "just works". But how does she define "it works"? The child becoming obedient? That's not exactly what many parents want, but it would be the classic approach to child rearing (teaching kids obedience)...

   Her book may be a good thing, for people who find it difficult to dig their way through all the information online. Personally I am wary of that type of public science book of outsiders of the field digging through hundreds of articles. At the end of the day, they might still fall prey to confirmation bias or only consider research that supports their thesis.

   Any why is it so important to drink alcohol during pregnancy? There really weren't that many rules - no alcohol, no raw cheeses or meats, no honey. It's not an impossible toll on mothers, although my wife still has high respect from me for being extremely consistent about all those rules during pregnancy.

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